|
|
Post by valerie on Jan 31, 2012 15:25:06 GMT -5
I wasn't really sure where to post, so I came back to this part. It's been at least a few months since I have posted anything, although I "lurk" several times a week. I go to a few other message boards also, and this one seems to have people who genuinely care about each other. Some of the other boards seem to have some really critical folks, and us "newbies" find that a little intimidating! I was struggling with smoking when I was on here last, and I'm at peace with that now. My husband is still smoking and I'm still not smoking. My pulmonologist actually said that he feels the reason my husband hasn't quit smoking in front of me is because he wants me to fail  . Hopefully, the doc is wrong, but it does kind of make a weird kind of sense! I have tried talking pretty frankly with the hubby, but I don't seem to be getting through to him. He SAYS he's going to quit smoking in the house and in my car, but he just keeps on doing it. I don't ride in his truck, so he can smoke his brains out in it - it just bugs me having him driving my car with me in it while he blows smoke all over the place. I'm not giving up the battle - just taking a break from it for a while. I don't have the slightest desire to smoke these days! I started pulmonary rehab a few weeks ago, and for the most part it is going very well. I had an episode of A-Fib there one day and it caused quite a bit of drama, but that was over two weeks ago and all has been well since then. I just had an echocardiogram yesterday as a result of having to get cleared by my cardiologist, and hopefully he has nothing new to report when I see him again. I suppose if it's bad news he will get in touch with me, so no news is good news. I'm so very proud of the progress I've made in rehab so far,and I am learning so much. I hope everyone is doing well, and I will try to be better about checking in. I do come on and look for new topics, but I really haven't seen anyone posting much recently. |
|
|
|
Post by Cherylmcc on Jan 31, 2012 19:28:29 GMT -5
Hello Valerie,
It's really nice to hear from you. I'm glad you've made such great progress with your stopping smoking. I'm sorry your hubby is still smoking in the house and car. My hubby smoked in the house for a year after I quit. He figured because he wasn't smoking in the same room as I was in, it was fine. I told him he was a dork. He finally did quit smoking himself a year after I did. There was no problem with smoking in the car, because he felt the resale value of a car was lower if it had been smoked in. We didn't smoke in the car.
I hope your Dr is wrong in that he thinks your hubby wishes you would fail. I hope you can convince your hubby how much harm he is doing to your lungs by forcing you to inhale his second hand smoke.
Keep up the good work at rehab. It will certainly help. Please keep us posted on your progress.
|
|
|
|
Post by merryfl on Jan 31, 2012 20:01:29 GMT -5
hi Valerie. Good to see you again. You're right about not too many new topics...we tend to go in spurts that way. But, we always check in to Daily Chat to let everyone know who's doing what, and why.
I don't remember if I told you this before -- My husband told me if I ever managed to quit smoking, he would too. I quit October 5, 2000...Then he said if I got a transplant, he'd definitely quit. Transplant was March 30, 2009. He still smokes. But, only outside. No one smokes in our house or our vehicles. Your husband sounds like the guy whose wife is on a diet, so he brings home donuts....Can you whack him upside the head with something?? Or take him to you next Pulmo appt. and let the doc explain the facts to him?
I'm glad you're doing Pulmonary Rehab -- it will help you so much! Keep up the good work, and check in with us in Daily Chat. We'll be glad to see you.
|
|
|
|
Post by Colleen-NC on Feb 3, 2012 11:27:54 GMT -5
Hi Valeris, glad to see you pop in! AND, Congrats on the quitting...it is hard and your doing great! Don't really ahve any advise for the hubby, they can be so thick headed, maybe he is in denial that your really sick and by acting like this things won't change for him??? Who know why people do the thing they do. I would tell him that he can't ride or use my car if he smokes, hide the keys or something.....try to let him know that this is really important to you.
Anyway, stop in more often, we would love to have you pop into chat. You will get all kinds of support no matter what your going through!!!
|
|
|
|
Post by sue on Feb 3, 2012 14:42:18 GMT -5
Valerie, that's fantastic on your quit!! I'm so very proud of you! And rehab too, you're on a roll for the good so keep going and dont let anyone get in your way! I'm the only one in my family that quit smoking, kids say they will stop but havent. Hubby wont quit either. He needs to at least go to those electric cigarettes, I'm hearing you feel like your smoking without the nicotine and tar but I dont know how true that is. Amy has a starter kit for that now, I think she only uses it at work tho. Anyway, keep it up and I hope to see you stick around and post more if you feel up for it!
|
|
|
|
Post by virginiaala on Feb 3, 2012 17:24:42 GMT -5
Valerie, its so good to read your post and your doing great, plus the rehab.. I think your a person that knows what she wants and is strong. I really have a feeling , hubby will come to agree with you after a while. And I guess I might have pulled what he is pulling at one time it was a big addiction and I quit 3 times before finally gave it up. But I waited to late now , I have emphysmea. I stuggle everyday for btreath like all the others, and wish I had stopped or stayed stopped sooner.
Anyway, girl come back to see us and let us know how your doing.
|
|
|
|
Post by maryaz on Feb 3, 2012 18:38:14 GMT -5
Valerie, On this board we have been together quite a long time and get to know one another. We welcome new people to join in and we like to have new members. It is probably a little more personal. We do support one another. When we first quit smoking I could really smell the smoke of others. I never realized how bad I had to smell. Once I had really got off the cigs I did not want to ever pick one up again. It is not easy to quit. Rehab is excellent. There is so much a person can learn about the disease too. Anything that relates to COPD and that includes the smoking you can put in the COPD area next time. Chat is just to say hi or share whatever. There is a General Section which can be anything that doesn’t fit elsewhere. Hope you do keep visiting. We will look forward to hearing from you. Keep up the good work. Here is something you may or may not have ever read and is so true. inspired.freeservers.com/sicklungs.htmL |
|
|
|
Post by valerie on Feb 8, 2012 14:32:26 GMT -5
Thanks everyone! Mary, I have been looking for that "sick lungs don't show" and keep forgettting to ask at rehab if they have a copy. I read it once on another board a long time ago.
I guess we can all agree my husband is a dork, but I guess I'll keep him anyway! I'll be giving him the "Sick Lungs Don't Show" to read - maybe that will get through to him! Something has to sooner or later.
|
|
|
|
Post by maryaz on Feb 8, 2012 23:04:21 GMT -5
Never give up on those husbands. You just never know. When I was diagnosed with COPD I was not expected to live. I was not able to do much of anything after that (almost 10 years ago now). It was amazing the change in my husband. Things he did so very well and I would never have expected. Smoking he quit when I was in the hospital. He became such a good caregiver. Seriously, I think it made a difference that he watched me for almost 2 weeks and not knowing if I would ever go home again. I think too what makes an impression is see all the people in a Pulmonary Rehab and watching their exercising and wearing of oxygen. In one month I started rehab and we went for several years and he was here too. It doesn't affect everyone. Some people think it won't happen to them. Another bad mistake some smokers make is thinking 'it will kill me'. Worse could be if it didn't kill you and you survive, sort of like myself, and you no longer have much of a life. It is better to quit smoking and get a handle on the disease before it gets worse. COPD is not curable but it is treatable. Every cigarette adds to the damage and it won't come back. Good luck with him. Be patient. Just don't let his smoking affect your lungs. Nice to have you here.  |
|
|
|
Post by sue on Feb 9, 2012 19:06:17 GMT -5
Lol Valerie, I think all husbands have their dorky moments (Mine will say the same about me too  ) Say, google sick lungs dont show and several sites show up where you can copy it from. Have you tried that yet? I thought we had a copy here but didnt see it, but that doesnt mean anything either. How ya doing otherwise? |
|
|
|
Post by merryfl on Feb 10, 2012 15:26:39 GMT -5
Sue - Mary gave her the link above.
|
|
|
|
Post by Toby on Feb 10, 2012 20:26:30 GMT -5
Valerie, I sent you a large PM. I was going to put it here but I know they have heard it from me several times and I didn't want to bore them. Anyway, check your PM's. Linda
|
|
. Hopefully, the doc is wrong, but it does kind of make a weird kind of sense! I have tried talking pretty frankly with the hubby, but I don't seem to be getting through to him. He SAYS he's going to quit smoking in the house and in my car, but he just keeps on doing it. I don't ride in his truck, so he can smoke his brains out in it - it just bugs me having him driving my car with me in it while he blows smoke all over the place. I'm not giving up the battle - just taking a break from it for a while. I don't have the slightest desire to smoke these days!
) Say, google sick lungs dont show and several sites show up where you can copy it from. Have you tried that yet? I thought we had a copy here but didnt see it, but that doesnt mean anything either. How ya doing otherwise?
